Raisin McCain (These Colors Don't Run?)

Disclaimer:  This piece is by no means a reflection of political views of the author.  

The importance of proper punctuation is often underestimated.  A misplaced comma here, a missing apostrophe there--these mistakes can drastically change the meaning of a sentence.  Most recently this has been made aware by Lynne Truss in Eats, Shoots and Leaves: The Zero Tolerance Approach to Puncuation.  Though I have never read the book, I do know that the title stemmed from the old joke about the Panda shooting a waiter after finishing a delectable sangwich (He eats, shoots and leaves).  And the joke, I'm sure, stems from some zoologist who meant to write that a Panda eats shoots and leaves (minus the comma).  

But the other day I witnessed a particular punctuation problem that, for once, I agreed with.  Because it reflected my view of John McCain. 

While watching the CBS Morning Show live on Belmont's campus (which I was very proud of),  I had to laugh when John Rich appeared singing "Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy".  What a fitting song for a debate, I thought.  A song that opens with, "Well I don't give a dang about nothing, I'm just singing and bling-blinging."  Rather ironic, too, I must say, in light of recent CEOs taking a $400,000 vacation and ruining the economy.  

But even that wasn't what bothered me.

After a brief and awkward discussion with Harry Smith, Rich explained that he was going to do a song he wrote for his favorite candidate, John McCain.  The song, he said, was called "Raisin' McCain"--a clever, country-esque pun on the old saying, "Raisin' Cain (or Hell)."  However, as he was describing Senator McCain's great admiration for the tune, a little banner came across the bottom of the screen displaying the title of it.  "Raisin McCain," it said.  To the non-English major eye, this may seem completely normal.  But let me tell you my non-sweater-vest-wearing friends, it is not.  Instead of being an abbreviated form of the verb "Raising" (Raisin') using an apostrophe to punctuate it, the guy (I paid off) at CBS left off the apostrophe giving that old sun-dried grape of a candidate a new nickname:  Raisin McCain.

 

  (Above: John McCain at the Townhall Debate at Belmont University on Tuesday. AP)

Don't get me wrong, John McCain is a great guy.  He survived years in a Prisoner of War camp and I know that is where all his funny limps come from.  But he still looks so old.  Too old.  Especially for a country that needs a jump start.  Something like JFK.  Who cares if they nearly start WWIII, at least they look strong (and good) doing it.  My only question is:  How are we supposed to threaten other nations with nuclear holocaust when our Commander and Chief looks like the favorite snack of a hundred, hungry kindergartners?